Okay, here we are, blog number two. I'm kind of nervous now, like I should be writing something profound, but nothing is coming to me. Thought maybe I'd make it a kind of diary, but my life isn't that interesting. Well, maybe it is, I don't know. Let's give it a try.
Yesterday I visited Mrs X. She has kids, one of which has a new kid, and they have all been on the child protection register for years, dealing with all kinds of Social Services (SS) bullshit because the father happened to get locked up for something. Now, I don't know exactly what he did, but Mrs X says that he never laid a finger on her. However the SS seem to have on their reports that he beat her up. She says this is complete and total crap. Regardless, they have for some time viewed her children as being in danger, even though the supposed threat is in jail. Because of this she must yield to one surprise visit and one arranged visit from the SS every two weeks. This means that once every two weeks some fresh, eager SS officer turns up at her house unannounced and can demand a guided tour.
Mrs X tells me of the smugness and contempt she has experienced from the SS, and the sneaky way they interrogate her, and when they can get them alone, her children. Her son comes home from school with stories of SS interrogations, much like Orwell's 1984! Her early-teen son tells me how they begin with innocent questions like, 'what sports do you like?', and 'do you have any pets?', leading onto, 'oh and how many dogs do you have?', because too many dogs in the house with young children is grounds to take them away. The SS officer will soon come out with it, 'so, how does your mum punish you? Does she hit you?'. He truthfully tells them that she punishes him by taking away privileges and sending him to his room. He says that they don't accept that straight away and push him further. The boy is a lot of work and gets punished a lot, but he is generally a good kid. He just gets very bored. He also has dyslexia, and he is overweight so sometimes gets bullied. He responds to the bullying and gets in trouble. The school has already labelled him a 'troublemaker' because of previous incidents, but the boy is not malicious. He is intelligent in his own ways, sociable, friendly and confident. It is worth noting that he goes to an 'academy'. This is a school run for profit, so, as I understand it, the government pays the private company for each child they teach. They get more money for children with learning difficulties and are supposed give them more one-to-one time. He gets none. Gotta love capitalism - schools for profit is what freedom is all about (SARCASM ALERT).
Mrs X is a good person. She is a thoughtful person. She is a kind person. She is a philosophical, almost spiritual person, with an ear for bullshit. She was young when she had her first child, not too much older when she had her second, and not long after her third she became a grandmother. She keeps her house clean. She teaches her children to speak properly, not to swear, and they know not to, although she herself slips up in the heat of the moment. She is, and has for some time, been under an enormous amount of stress on a daily basis; stress which might break some people, but not Mrs X. Every week she struggles to keep her children fed, clothed, educated and entertained. She tries to get work when the kids are at nursery/school. She tries to afford them the holidays, clothes, computers and mobile phones which our society demands of them. She tries to forget her own desires; for love, for romance, for a life without struggle; but sometimes I see the tears she fights back.
Every time I go to see her I do my best to be a positive influence in her house. Her children have not grown up with their father, but it seems like they have had many positive male influences in their lives through her friends. I try my best to be one of those. I have given her son free tutoring, spend time drawing and talking with her daughter, I do what little I can to be a positive influence in my friend's household with the time I have, but every one of her efforts and the efforts of her friends are overshadowed by the SS interference and intimidation. Mrs X is not perfect, but she is a good mother and tries to instill values in her children, and their politeness and sociability usually reflect this. Her house is always tidy but Mrs X battles constantly to get her children, her son mostly, to keep their own rooms tidy and maintain their own hygeine, but it does seem like an uphill struggle for her most of the time. She is simultaneously screamed at for attention when there is more than one of the children at home and it seems very stressful for her, but she just about copes.
Her daughter just turned 18, days before giving birth to her first son. Because her daughter is now 18, Mrs X has been told her rent has gone up £80 a week, since her daughter should be working. She has spoken to the housing association and they say they might be able to knock it down, but even if they do, they are sticking an extra bill on her when they should be supporting the family further, and are threatening to take the daughter's new son away because she has missed a couple of SS interrogations. Mrs X now may have to move house because of the arrears that have quickly built up with the new charge. She has been in the house for a few years and has decorated and made it her home, and now she may have to uproot the fragile existence she has built for her family and start fresh.
Who the hell do these SS people think they are? They turn up at someone's house and scrutinise their entire lives for evidence to use against them, seeming like their ultimate goal is to steal the children rather than help the family! When I picture the SS as an entity, using everything I have been told about them, I see it as an evil child-eating gremlin hiding just round the corner, watching my friend and her family, rubbing its' dirty hands together and smacking its' bile-dribbling lips waiting for my friend to slip up so it can steal her children and put them into 'care', where ironically, no-one will ever care for them like their mother ever again.
I recently watched a video on youtube of a 13 year old boy being held down, cuffed and taken away from his father to be put into care, three days before Christmas (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EEUb9ZR_UD4). The boy said he did not want to go with them, so they said they would carry him out if they had to. They often use the old Nazi excuse of, "we are only following orders." No. They were not following orders. They are human beings who made a decision to kidnap a boy from his father because someone with a position told them to. An 'order' is an imaginary concept. Every person has the choice to refuse an 'order' made against them, so no matter who makes the 'order', whether it be the qUeen or a police officer, it is only EVER a request. Every person is free to decide their own actions. To relinquish responsibility for your actions because you are following orders is the most cowardly act. An 'order' is simply a well-dressed request.
This is "The Second Blog of Trig", signing off.
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